Showing posts with label MWC. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MWC. Show all posts

Saturday, February 4, 2012

A heart for Valentine's Day


In love we talk a lot about hearts. 
~Hearts that beat fast
~Hearts that skip a beat
~Hearts that break
~Hearts that wait

If you were anything like me, you felt the heart beating inside the chest of the man you loved more than once in your relationship. My favorite thing to do was to snuggle in close and be surprised when you could hear the heart raising faster, all because you two were near each other. (Sigh)

We all know that saying 'absence makes the heart grow fonder.' But we also know, permanent absence is not what they are talking about. Absence of a heartbeat means only one thing and we have experienced this crushing reality. It caused us to face how fragile hearts really are and brought our attention to caring for them.

In Holistic Healing, the heart chakra is vital to healing hurtful emotional life situations- grief, divorce, abandonment, abuse, adultery, rejection. Anything that connects us to love lost. Our hearts are wounded and we are like 'wounded children'. Like a child, they love unconditionally, they don't think about it, they sense it is what is good and give of it. 

I believe children do bring us back into emotional empowerment and allows us to trust and believe in the love that emanates from the center of our life force. Some heart strings will get cut too soon in life but we are the owners of thousands of strings that still exist and they become lifelines for us. 

When I found out that my husband's death certificate would say Feb. 14, 2000 on it, it was almost too much to bear thinking about living that out in the future. How could God allow this permanent reminder, it felt so cruel. After all, no one had loved a man greater than I did and more devastated than loosing that man on the most 'loving' holiday in this country. But He had a plan that I was unaware of, nor cared to know at the moment. 

Instead, I was being handed a piece of paper to check off boxes which listed organs in his body to donate. The very first box was the heart. 

My own heart sank and from somewhere came the strength to keep going. Check-lungs, check-kidneys, check-liver, check- cornia, check, check and check.......until every box was filled. 
Sometimes we do out of love what we don't understand, there's a place in your soul that calls out for you to do the right thing and you step up. Always listen to that quiet voice that comes when you feel you have lost everything. I did this and unselfishly gave the only loving action I had left to give.....donating my husbands body. 

I'm taking a moment to catch my breathe.

Months later, I became curious about another story out in the world- the story of a person who received Chad's heart on Valentine's Day? I imagined what an amazing blessing that had to be getting the call 'Happy Valentine's Day'. So I asked to find out and Translife told me I was not allowed. I persisted and wanted to write an anonymous letter if they would deliver it. They did. Then, I received a letter back with no name. 

This went on for 2 years.

Then, we were allowed to leave the privacy of Translife and do what we wanted. Guess what happened next?

I met the man who received Chad's heart. But more importantly I met the wife who thought she was going to loose her husband and on Feb. 14, 2000 fell down in tears of gratitude at the news that her husband would live. Then, I met their two children (same age as mine 4 & 6) and they didn't know what was going on!!! Lol. Neither did my children when they met.....they just became kids and started to play together. A beautiful distraction to an emotional reunion. A reminder to choose life.

Words really can't describe this moment. The newspaper covered it, it is an amazing story. For me, it shows the all powerful need to LOVE BIG and use our hearts until it hurts. It was God clearly giving grace and showing me more of His plan. Hurting can lead to great healing and so I open my heart and risk the hurt that might come everyday. We are all capable of this. Will you love big today, until it hurts? Plant this new seed thought, then grow where you are planted. He's winking at you.

 That's what I wanted to share with you this morning from my humble home in Orlando.
Dedicated to the legacy that MWC children are leaving in this world,

Here's the REST OF THE STORY- Enjoy.

Click here for the: Orlando Sentinel Article 

Friday, February 3, 2012

Roller Coasters and Valentine's Day


What do roller coasters and loosing your husband have to do with each other? Well, for starters its what I do every Valentines Day. WHY?

Because its the anniversary of Chad's death,  and on that day, I do things in his honor to remind me of the life he lived and shared with me...the life that still exists in this life of mine. I do things that honor that contagious laugh, that love for beer and roller coasters. I LIVE because I can. Roller coasters and being a kid for a day is how life was with him and I take one really special day for me to remember this.

Recently, Cindy Nelson, Seattle's MWC Chapter Leader told me of her plan for Valentine's Day- to gift widows and single moms at her church with gift certificates for oil changes. WHY? Because her husband was a mechanic and generously would give back in this way during his life. He was known for his generosity. So, to honor Mike, she continues this and it brings her happiness to be connected to such life. 


What is it your spouse did in this world that was wonderful and is remembered for? When we share and continue these life giving characteristics, they pleasantly bring us life in the process. 

At Modern Widows Club, giving back, connecting to the life around us is a big part of our message. It's what takes you from surviving to thriving. Something as small as taking flowers to another elderly widow in your neighborhood who you might not think you have anything in common, can strengthen a heart like nothing else....in both directions. Life is hard, really hard. When we do our part to make it easier for another, it eases our life in return. 

We would love for you to share what you do to honor your late husband, every effort counts and you never know who is reading this blog and how it will touch them. Share your big love with us and pick up another jewel for your invisible crown. 

From my heart,


P.S. If you'd like to meet other women like you. Come to MWC: Social Hour on Feb. 16, 2012. EVERY 3rd Thursday. It's FREE. Sign in below. 



Want a MWC chapter in your town? Send inquiries to: carolyn@modernwidowsclub.com